and just as i'm typing my last post,
daddy comes back from hospital.
(he had to make an emergency trip to the ER)
He scolds me.
I don't evne know how i completed typing that last post.
Great, phone confiscation is extended to one month.
I REALLY DON'T NEED THAT. I DONT WANT MY PHONE CONFISCATED AGAIN.
He says i treat my life like its some kind of fun game and i don't produce any results.
Its really hard sometimes, you know.
Trying to be positive about life when for one there is this girl in my church who seemingly has something against me when i haven't done anything to her and seems to be out to make my life hell or make me jealous or something. (Thanks for stealing my EX best friend by the way)
There is the whole cca thing which is really getting to me, and i don't understand why, but there are people IN MY CCA who are really getting to me. I know, i know, people change... BUT STILL.Sometimes its a bit much.
Trying to deal with society in general, GRADES.
I'm not a stupid girl, no, i'm smart.
I'm just not putting in effort to do well.
I'm trying, i'm trying.

But then,
trying never gets you anywhere. Does it?

I don't hate myself.
I don't hate my dad.
I think he's trying to force me to study, i know he's worried.
But still, it's hard and i'm trying.