Ward's scoldings haven't sunk in yet, daym.
I have to study, study, study.
GO STUDY JACQ, OR YOU ARE GONNA SCREW YOUR O LEVELS, GET MORE THAN 10 POINTS AND WILL HAVE TO JUMP OFF A BUILDING.

SEE THIS FACE, IT'S MY HARDWORKING FACE >:S
YES.

i shall go hardcore mug all the way.
I need my 8A1s.

I CAN DO IT, I CAN DO IT, I CAN, I CAN, I CAN!!!
fighting!~ ^^v

i got a new aim: beat ward's score.
GO JACQ GO!!

Do you realise how some words seem to be losing their real meaning, overused words like: awesome, epic, and most of all, the word - love.

I realise that even when written in chinese, the word love, or 爱, does not really encompass the full meaning of what it is to "love". However, as i'm watching the music video of 最幸福的事 by 梁文音 , i realise that they don't use the word "爱" in the video, in contrast though, they use instead, the traditional chinese word for love, or 愛.


And it dawned upon me, just how much more significant it is when written as 愛, as opposed to writing 爱.

In the simplified chinese word, 爱 has the word for friend, or 友 inside it. Meaning that the love could be one for that of a friend. Although the traditional chinese word 愛 also has the same meaning, it also encompasses the word for heart, or 心 inside it. This is thus, much more significant as it then enforces the meaning that love (愛) for one's friend (友) , comes from the heart (心).

Doesn't it seem so much more truthful, and honest that way, when writing to someone 我愛你 (i love you), as opposed to writing 我爱你, or saying "i love you" ?
Well, i definitely think so...

在這個世界上, 愛情仍然是最寶貴的♥

i'm going a little crazy these days.
I need to start being a happier girl.
I shall go listen to my favourite chinese song now.
It's 最幸福的事 by 梁文音.
I almost cry everytime i listen to it.
So much meaning, so little said...

It's really a pity how life sometime just flies by us, without us even realising.
Isn't it...

I am clearly not like other people.

I'm so angry right now.
Last time, M got pissed with me because I told E that M like me, and E told S.
Doesn't that sound confusing?
Anyway. So then S, or E, whichever, started spreading rumours/ telling other people that M liked me. So M got pissed off with me, even though i wasn't the one who started spreading the rumours.
Great, just great.

Now, E's pissed with me.
Because he went to K's house, and i told S.
He said that rumours are being spread now.
So he sent mee a "_|_", he called me "bitch" and told me to "fuck off".
Hang on a sec, why am I being scolded for spreading rumours which i didn't spread?
Great, just great.

And now K hates me, i think.
Seriously, it's my fault?
E didn't even say i couldn't tell anyone about him going to K's house.
Gosh.
I know that they didn't do anything stupid.
I'm not a retard.

WHY IS IT ALWAYS MY FAULT WHEN RUMOURS GET SPREAD IF IM NOT THE ONE SPREADING THEM?
I FOUND THE POINT IN "P.E.E.L" , BUT WHERE'S YOUR EVIDENCE, AND LINK.
THERE"S NO FUCKING EVIDENCE AND LINK, STOP ACCUSING ME.

There's so much injustice in the world.
I have to pray for the people who keep being wronged by others.
I don't know why it always happens to me.
It's not fair.
Then again, nothing is.
There's no justice in all this.

Don't assume that because i talk to a lot of people, and am sociable, am kind-of a bitch, and i kind-of gossip, that i will be the one spreading rumours about you, because frankly, i have way better things to do in life then make up some shit, or go around spreading shit, about you.

Please stop judging me.

Had the best time with Kimberly & Grace after YL session today!
I love you both very much (:
This sounds so bias, and i suppose that some people will take offence to this, however, from my point of view, i consider it very much true.
Church friends seem like they're for life, school friends, well... :/
I quote a tumblr picture i saw, "They ask you to be yourself, and then, they judge you".
Isn't that why everyone goes around being fake? It makes them so much more likeable, as compared to being true to themselves.
Well, i'm not perfect, so yes, i can be fake too at times.
I try, but sometimes trying isn't enough.

I must learn to judge less.

Labels: church, kim

Less than 280 days till O levels.
Am i scared? You bet.

The last two weeks have been pretty manageable, and i hope i continue to cope well.
I think it is really vital for me to get a Single Digit for my O levels.
I can't think of how i'd survive otherwise.
Exactly 359 days from now, i'll be collecting my results.
I'm waiting for that day with intrepid determination.

I will not let myself down.

I seriously have to start studying harder.
I'm definitely falling behind everyone else in all my subjects. It was clearly evident on friday, during our elective history lesson when i had to constantly ask Mrs Low for help.
I feel entirely daft in comparison to the others.
I definitely do have a better attitude towards my studies this year.
I haven't handed up a single piece of homework late yet!

On a brighter note,
I have actually enjoyed studying and doing my homework.
I am exceptionally happy.
I feel really accomplished.
Also, i have been reading Daddy Long Legs which was written by Jean Webster.
The story is absolutely enchanting, and the style in which Jerusha Abott writes to her guardian is in proper english, such that i feel that i'm picking up the style of it.
There are definitely a few things that i'm looking forward to. One of which is next week's YL session.

Today felt absolutely unnerving and unusual in a sense that i had no catechism.
There is a two hour gap in my schedule. So not used to it.

I text way less now, and i'm not used to seeing my phone without its usual beeping tone that chimes every few minutes.
Unusual, unusual.

I need to increase my vocabulary.
It is exceptionally poor.

This post is so abrupt.
Maybe that's how i'm feeling right now.
I feel as if i'm not really here; my mind is drifting, and thinking of... other things.

2011 shall be a good year.
I know that this is going to be true for a fact, because i have a whole group of wonderful friends at the moment, and they have made my last two weeks a lot more fun than i would've predicted it to be.

and i shall end off this post with a happy picture that i took from my tumblr:

You didn't talk to me at all today!
You really went MIA.

It's true,
I miss him.
& I feel so lost without that familiar pillar of strength near me.
lost.

Next year, this time, i want my name to be on the list that says "8A1s"

i look at our friendship and think sometimes:

i believe that one reason why everybody loves Charlie McDonnell, or better known by his youtube persona: Charlieissocoollike , is because when he does vlogs, he seems to be none other then himself. He does weird, wacky things, and he doesn't seem to mind if anyone judges him. He just acts as himself. And THAT, is exactly why he's so admired. To think about it, it actually really isn't that hard to be yourself. Maybe it's the fear we all inwardly feel that we may be judged which stops us from being our true selves. I believe that it is just that.

Basically, i called ward yesterday, and for 40minutes straight, he guilt tripped me about studying and all that. I actually cried. He is the first person to successfully guilt trip me about studying without actually making me feel like slapping him and without him screaming/shouting at me.
My conclusion after that, is that: I'm screwed.
Ward cares, way too much.

i think this is my first 2011 post! Whee!~

You know how they always say you should start the New Year off with a bang?
Well i did just that. Literally.
Try having a nerf gun fight, first thing into the New Year. Absolutely awesome.

I already made a new friend too.
TANGYONGJEN.
He's freaking tall ):
But it was so funny, cos we were making stupid jokes and shooting each other with nerf guns at the same time. We seemed drunk, but we weren't...?
Because after midnight, it was quite confusing when you talk about stuff and go "this year...NO WAIT i mean Last year!.."
Like:
"I haven't eaten..SINCE LAST YEAR"
"I haven't bathed...SINCE LAST YEAR"
"I haven't gone to school...SINCE LAST YEAR"
But seriously, these jokes only work once a year. Gosh...SO MUCH FUN (:

And i must say, i like playing with nerf guns (:
I'm more pro than yong jen, for the fact that i didn't scream when andre and ryan tried to shoot ammo at me (:
AND I CAN SHOOT YONGJEN WHEN IM NOT LOOKING! (Y)
Hahahaha.

I hope next year will be like this too!!
I can't wait for this year to end!
I also do hope i do well for my Os this year.
STRESS!
:o